The more I know you, the less I like you,
everything is a game for you
to probe that you are better than the rest
that you deserve the best.
The more you expose your natural person
the more the darkness filters
through the cracks of your intentions
the more and more I lost interest.
The real you is unkind,
not the type of person I want to have a round,
I am done wasting my energy
in your judgments and negativity.
Free things feel extraordinary,
like the universe is awarding you just for existing,
but you must be wary,
because they won't bring you enlighting.
Perks, those are the hit run,
those are the awards for a well-done job
for investing, supporting and trusting the fun
while you are listening to the throb.
My to-do list is never-ending,
more things are added
and it takes all my thinking
to do the deed.
My attention span is inexistent,
all the things I must do merge with the ones I want to do
and what others are adding as an expectant
requests to not do more but more do.
I need to focus,
on me, on the importance,
on priorities that are not just hocus pocus,
but there is discordance.
Everything I read about life hacks
and happy living]indicates doing one thing at a time,
but I juxtapose TV and workout in my shack,
and at least two other things at a time.
You wish you could merge them all into one woman,
The passionate voluptuous french woman
who was your twin flame,
but it burned too hot and meted your security.
The geeky green eyed german
with the most beautiful smile,
full lips and perfect white teeth
who made you laugh non-stop
and opened the door of your imagination
and challenge you to think that you might not deserve her.
The perfect ass of that Latina who had a dream body,
but it emotionally manipulated you until you cried pushing through pain.
The charisma of that woman of the world, who had the world in her hands
with only a whisper.
The funny creative Scandinavian woman
the one you finally allowed yourself to be yourself and
matched your weird sense of humor,
with porcelain skin, as breakable as her mental health.
The emotional mature and wisdom giver
older lady who nursed back to life,
who gave you faith and will,
but who you couldn't correctly love.
The dancer who led you in a way that made you fly,
all over the dancefloor like suspended in the clouds.
All these women you wish you could merge into a perfect one.
Running all day to get to a relaxing place,
fast breathing to keep the rhythm
to get into the slow calm zone.
I do yoga every day,
somedays I have to run to it...
and that might take away the benefits,
but hey, I made it to the mat, so namaste to you.
I have no time for Shavasana,
I am here to stretch, workout and find unity.
When was the last time we danced together?
It has been too long