the poet

 I have just met a woman who introduced herself as a poet,

My brain went immediatly into "WOW"

WOW because i am imprease at her self awareness and strenght

to do what she loves ina world where that is not verya ppreatiaced

WOW because in my internal monologo, I want to label myself as a poet too,

but I ack the self steeam 

and I am too self aware that my writing might be have the quality to get to the 

"I am a poet" statement.

Then i start the recollection... I have pubblished 2 poems,

I have won awards and contests, and I have read my poems in public...

but what makes a poet "A poet"?

I need to do propper research about this, as the scientiest I am...

and then, why I am proud to label myself as a scientiest but not as a poet?

because I went to universitiy and have a doctorate?

and I "do" science almost every day...

Then I let all this soliloquio go, and share my creative process with my new poet friend

and I am again in Awe, because she also have this feeling that she needs to put her thought in a paper,

it is like a fire that is going to ignate your brain if you don't get ride of all these words,

it is a burning desire to put all this ideas outside your brain,

and when it is done, when you had written everything you were regusgitating,

than peace arrives.

You are the bright proof of a live fully lived

 All the holes that things and people who are not here anymore have cause, are full now, nomore empty space and scary painful scars, 

You are cover on scars and you are more beutiful without the make up you use to cover them,

dont waste your time, they are too deep, we can see them under the conselear, under whatever you called that powder.

the ones who are worthy will love you as you are, no veil needed, no fake smiles,

just be you as amazing as you are, and as messed up, and the real ones will love you,

we will love you, the real work in progress scared you.

Reflexion

 The reflexion you see it might be reallity,

or it might be your perception.

Just step in front of the mirrow and open your eyes,

not only your physical ones,

but your soul too.

What you offer without any expectation,

is what it will come back to you.

That coffe you made for your lover first thing in the morning,

that food to go you cooked in a rush for them to have a snack,

all that will come back in a million gifts.

It had to die

 It had to die, to give the space to a fresh new start,

It has to be gone and evaporate because two things can not be in the same place at the same time,

And all moves all changes

So you need to open your hands and let it go, instead of holding it tight in your fist 

Give a high five to life and accept it.

Trying to be in peace

 In the middle of a lot of hate speech, and people who don't care 

and fake sweet porcelain teeth smiles,

In the midst of disappointment and lazy people...

I am trying to be at peace.

It is sooo difficult,

The peace keeps falling from my hands like sand.

Deep breaths and focus, enjoying the now,

following thousands of years old wisdom...

trying to find my compass and my path.

Stratign to get frustrated at people who are pieces of shit, 

who are so narcissistic and self-centered

that makes me puke

Memories

 My mother used to say about me: you can’t give her beautiful things because she won’t take proper care of them…

Was she right? I think so 

I tend to buy cheap stuff because i now i can easily damage them,

Or break the whole thing due to my clumsiness.

I have the memory of this comment again and again. 

And it might turned into a self fulfilling prophecy 

I am exactly where I am supposed to be

 In the rush of western life,

i found an oasis in Cambodia,

A peace pond, full of happiness and joy,

And fresh air where you can breathe freedom.

I ate vegetarian food at Peace,

And then have delicious chicken cashews at Heaven, all wholesome initiatives.

Problems as catalyst to change,

i needed hurt you for you to listen, 

I wonder if 

is this how god operates? 

To keep you enjoying the now,

 to keep you following the universe and surrender to it, to not fight it nor force it, 

because that creates more negativity and pain. 

You are force to change to grow, 

To follow Rumi and Buddha beautiful lessons

There is a big gap between who i want to be and who i am, 

i need to let go of a lot to be Buddhist,

 the I am is not to reach nirvana, but just to be, in the now,

Because I am exactly where I am supposed to be.

This trip motto was “change of plans”, and in accepting what i can not change, I changed myself for the better.