Proceed with caution

 I blocked the entrance of my castle,

and I ran upstairs to the highest tower,

I admired life from here and it was great, 

the blue skies, the rainbows and the green hills.

I didn't let anyone in, I blocked any possibility,

but there you were, trying again and again,

asking me to let you in,

to go for a test run.

it is not you, it is my past trauma,

it is not that I am scared of you hurting me,

It is more that I don't want to hurt anyone,

because I hurt the person I cared about the most,

and the wound is still fresh and bleeding.

You saw my clean face, without makeup,

with my huge pores, more prominent than my flat,

with old clothes and even sick,

and you still wanted me.

When I was hiding from the rest, and rejecting any attention,

you gently waited, and shared your warmth and kindness.

But I must advise you to proceed with caution.

Four decades to catch up

 So much to tell you,

so much to share

a full world for you

a lot to dare.

All my memories,

all my experiences,

I want to open these experiences,

being vulnerable in this instance.

I have four decades to catch up with you

to fill in the gaps

and find the blanks with you

and turn our story into a win

Adulting 101

 I want to go out and play,

enjoy the sun and run without any lower back and knee pains.

I don't want to worry about the future and what it may...

I want to enjoy getting wet and trapped in the rain.

Freedom of childhood brings melancholia back,

dreams of a better future and complete trust in my strength.

There was a time when I flew high,

with no fears, not chains, only the sky at length.

Now a mortgage is a constant issue,

the inflation is breathing on my neck,

overcommitting and admin stuff are drowning me.

Allegiance to be human

 I pledge Allegiance to me,

to my values and my care.

I pledge allegiance to the people I love and love me back.

I also pledge allegiance to fight for social justice.

One person can make a difference,

as long as they pledge the proper allegiance.

In a world full of noise and false gold

that gives smoked power

exchanged by lack of values and 

temporal happiness.

I pledge allegiance to always support the ones who fight for justice

and equality.

I pledge allegiance to mother earth who provides for all of us,

and not the ones who tried to destroy her for profit.

We are all just one alliance, one energy transmuting from here to there

and back, pledging allegiance to the flow.

They will always be there

 Your thoughts, your friends, the coffee beans,

They will always be there.

The sun hiding behind the clouds,

Or burn you alive in a full-blown,

It will always be there.

Always, I meant in your life span,

Because that yellow dot will turn into a blues dwarf.

Books, shows, impactful art,

They will always be there for you to cheer you up.

You can’t escape being you. 

in and out

 You come into my life,

you leave, I exit you,

you try to come back as a friend,

exit again, in and out...

And 15 years passed since we first crossed paths,

since you seduced me and I drove you crazy.

Since we shared music and hot air,

fantasies and carcasses.

You gain weight and lose energy,

I calmed down and expected nothing.

You are a successful business man now,

almost on the verge of retirement,

but I am about to access the higher steps in my career ladder.

So different, but so full of passion.

Ticker

Dancing can lead to kissing,

and I don't want to be another tick on your list,

you won't check me out,

you won't have a done emoji next to my name.

while you keep pushing your luck,

and our bodies next to each other,

I have to keep  my fake smile,

keep smiling and pretending all was good.

I know your game,

you are the player that seduces,

the gamer who gambles,

and always wins.