Hold your hand

I am waiting for the fear to pass,
so we can walk free as we had never done before,
I am waiting for the moment when we can finally hold hands,
without fear.

I am waiting for the storm to pass,
and leave us some sun and fresh haze,
so we breathe again and relax
being next to each other for real.

I am waiting for the world to stop judging,
to let us be free and follow our desires,
to let us run free and kiss without fear,
without the constant vigilance.

I am waiting for just enjoying being together
without constantly checking over my shoulder
if someone would be frowning at us,
disapproving of how we break their rules.

I am waiting for the rules to fall to new rules,
to let us rule ourselves for what we think is right,
because your hand on mine feels right,
the best kind of right followed by your smile.

Resilience

When I did what I wanted,
defying the rules and even hurting people I cared about,
I felt free, I felt powerful and motivated,
I was in a total mindset of being without.

When I did what I wanted,
and kissed you and followed you wondering about,
I was warm, I was happy again, I felt loved,
and then. the storm reached out.

The momentary happiness had to be paid and the end,
All the freedom I soaked turned me into a sellout
Was I a hypocrite? Telling people how to be loved
why and how to do the right thing and don't break out

Or was I just evolving and changing for a better friend?
I only knew I wanted to chase you and hangout
because when I did what others wanted
when I followed the rules of the social layout
I was not being me, I was just surfing the waves that melted.

I have to be resilient to face what I created for myself,
when I took the decisions to do what I wanted,
even if those actions hurt people I loved,
because I couldn't fly with broken wings.

I walked on water to see you again,
and in the middle of it, I have drawn myself and my entourage.
Resilience is like a safe boat that will come to rescue us.

Passion

Passion is underestimated,
buried under duties
pressure and denied
by the evil made up rules

Passion can wake you up,
can fill you with joy
cleaning the messed-up
life in chaos and melancholy

Passion runs through your veins
burning the pain
creating bright reins
fighting the chain


Passion will get you at some point
before you feel your life is worthless
you just need the sync viewpoint
the mindset shift to get careless

Cross

You told me I looked beautiful,
I answered it is because you are looking through your beautiful eyes,
you smiled soo bright, nothing was dull
enlightening the skies.

You told me that when you enter the room,
your eyes desperately searched for me,
like if everything without me was gloom,
I feel the same and just want to spree.


You told me I looked beautiful,
I answered it is because you are looking through your beautiful eyes,
and therefore you can only see the beauty around you.
We were going in opposite directions, we were from different worlds and it didn’t matter the connection,
because the direction and the timing were wrong.
It feels like a real conversation when you lead me but let me play,
and then I lead you and let you play.
you let me shine, I let you shine
It is impossible to stop laughing because we are truthfully happy
and having the time of our lives.
I touched your cross, you guide me into it,
my hand on your hand flying through the air,
following the music, reaching your heart.
I can feel your heartbeat,
I can listen to it from far away.
I touched the cross that you carry
and I am eager to understand its meaning.
I had to feel every edge and corner of your cross,
to be sure it was a cross indeed.
The unsure feeling, the not knowing can kill
the doubt, the hesitation is also a cross
Remembering your hazelnut eyes, with some green freckles,
shinning with the sun energy,
highlighting the warm that is in your heart
You lifted me up, you were there when I needed help
you helped me to see what I was not able to see before
even if that was obstructing your own view
Your presence makes me happy,
it is just your aura and your smile
shinning and brightening all the rooms that you honored with your presence.
We play a game like if we will win it,
but we are barely surviving it.

Everything is ok....isk... Ok-ish

I am in an era in my life where everything seems all right,
I am healthy,
well, dancing a partner forced a wrong turn and damaged my shoulder,
it hurts like hell when I try to raise it up,
and in an unuseful attempt to do a split,
I tore up the tendons in the hamstring,
same pain as in the shoulder
Also, I am gaining weight very fast even eating healthy.
I guess I am just getting old.

However, I have a roof over my head,
well, we are renting a tiny flat in a far away zone,
and it is quite pricey, I would like to buy my own,
but the cost is too much
I guess it is just inflation

Nevermind, I have a loving family
well, most of them live far away,
and by far away I mean crossing the ocean and a continent.
They request thing for me anyways,
I guess I am just too picky


Furthermore, I have a loving partner,
well, sometimes we disagree and we get upset,
we have different views on life and priorities
I guess nobody is perfect

Moreover, I have lovely caring friends
well, again the life long ones
who know me to the bone are far far far away,
I guess I need to get used to missing them

Alright, I have a great job that has an impact on people's lives
well, that is a bit of an overstatement
and the salary is way lower than my former industry job
I guess I have to be grateful for I have and do.

Nevertheless, I live in a democratic country,
well, with a queen and representatives that I can't elect,
I can't even vote although I pay taxes here
I guess I have to accept the price of being an inmigrant

Finally, I guess I am ok, OK-ish

Forever immigrant

Forever Immigrant

I changed the city that never sleeps
for the city where I have to run to catch the last subway (aka tube).
I changed the small big apple for a huge old gigantic watermelon city
I am still on an island,
I am still near a gorgeous park and high modern buildings,
high rises and all gentrification follows me.

I thought my forever immigrant status won't change,
and then it changed, I choose to change it.
The Xmas lights are everywhere
and home can be wherever you decide to be.
Butterfly mind
we are travelers of life,
we are forever immigrants
because even if we were born in a piece of land,
or we bought it, it is not who we are,
and we don't really own it
21 Reasons why I am a forever immigrant...

I thought my forever immigrant status won't change,
and then it changed, I choose to change it.
My fight to be a permanent resident ended in on the city
just to start in the next one.
The outdoor dances can be found if you really look for them.
The hot summer days will arrive at some point,
climate change will make sure of that.
My melancholia for a city with more sun and fewer clouds
will pass fast like a summer storm
Kind people that connect with you,
and even more importantly, you can be your silly self around them,
can be found like beautiful bright flowers blooming on wild weed.
The Xmas lights are everywhere
and home can be wherever you decide to be.

Over-water life

I overwatered my plants because I over care about things.
I over care sooo much that I kill things.
I killed succulents, such as Aloe vera because I cared too much.
I asked guests 20 times if they want coffee or tea... or more cookies, or more air...or anything,
I asked 10 times "How are you? do you need anything?" to my husband, when he is sick
and that bothers him.
I am sooo caring that I annoyed people
I look like I have the steering wheel,
but in reality, I don't
I am just following the wind
like a leaf, just moving around wherever the wind blows
but always moving